Lame

Well Thanksgiving was just a couple days ago. Now the christmas lights get put up, leftovers used for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and the family spends time together, enjoying the holidays. Right? Well, no; not in my case. In my house we still have halloween decorations up around the house, no leftovers from Thanksgiving, and I rarely see another family member. My father spends his days on the computer playing games. My brother spends his days watching videos on his phone and playing games on his laptop. My mother spends her days sleeping and watching tv. And me? I run away.

Well not physically, I just try my best to get out of the house as much as possible. I go to my boyfriend’s house as much as I can. I love it there. It is quiet, yes, but they still show that they realize others are living there whom they love. His sister will come in at the most random times asking for hugs and to tell her brother she loves him. It touches my heart. I can’t remember the last time my brother told me he loved me. Yes, I fall guilty too. I don’t tell my family that I love them maybe as much as I should. Maybe I just don’t feel like I should. Like they have to do something that seems that they deserve it. They have to be deserving for me to recognize that I care about them, believe in them, and love them. That might be selfish of me, but oh well. I just want to be loved. To have that intense feeling of affection, from my family. I only get that feeling  that I desire from one person, my lovely boyfriend. Honestly, right now, I really don’t know how I would have gotten this far without him by side.

Anyway, that is why I feel as though my life is a lame. I don’t feel as though my family is a family. I wished we did things like other families do. I wish my christmas lights were up, that we had a refrigerator full of leftovers, and a family spending the holidays together. 

 

P.S. Thanks for putting up with my venting 🙂

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. mikimayla
    Dec 04, 2013 @ 03:48:22

    Sweet! I finally met someone who feels how I feel! Lol…

    Reply

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